So i decided it was time for me to write a new post, but I have a million things going through my head and not sure of things i should and should not write about, but one thing I do and will ALWAYS know for sure, is, I MISS MY SON! AND I don't mind letting everyone know that YES I DO BLAME THE IDIOTS HE LIVED WITH!!!! I hope God still loves me even though, right now, I cannot forgive them, maybe I will in time, I'm not sure, but for now, it's a no.
I have been thinking alot lately about the kids father, and just how he NEVER did and NEVER has taken responsibility for ANYTHING that he has ever done, he blames me for EVERYTHING that went wrong in our marriage, now I know I am not perfect and have never claimed to be, but dammit it wasn't ALL my fault, I take the blame for my part, so why cant HE do the same, and why does it bother me so much? You know, I used to tell the kids when they were little, that no matter what, their daddy loved them, and I would never let them bad mouth him, and I never did in front of them, but dammit, I am soooooo over that, he is such a worthless piece of s**t, who gave me and MY daughter hell over permissions to cremate MY son, and then the sorry ass didn't even come to his own sons funeral, and yes I say MY because he is NEVER there for them. His excuse was he didn't have time to arrange to take his daughter out of school, OK LOSER, leave her at home with HER mom and you come, and at least be there for your son the last time you are EVER gonna have the chance too. It just burns me up, and I am so sorry for venting on here but i need to let it out, and I know y'all are here for me. But it really just breaks my heart to think that he did that to Michael, it's like one last F**k off, what a sorry bastard.
I have never been and will never be the PERFECT mom, but one thing my kids ALWAYS knew and will ALWAYS know, is that I am here for them, no matter what.......
I love you Michael, See You When I See You
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